International Women’s Day

Yesterday was International Women’s Day and I felt like I could take on the world. As I scrolled through the numerous posts heralding the many successes of women, I felt empowered. I identified with them, I thought that’s me, I’ve got this. I looked at my daughter and felt, more than ever, that I would be a strong, confident role model, the one to show her that she can achieve anything she puts her mind to. I thought of my Mum and my Gran, the two women I look up to the most. Both sure of who they are, sure of their own opinion and able to hold their own in disagreements with grace and eloquence. That’s who I want to be for my daughter and who I thought I was until tonight. 

Tonight I feel about two inches tall. I feel like a silly girl, unsure of herself and reliant on others to fight her corner. I am aware as I write this how petty it seems, all because of a Facebook post, but it’s something that’s forced me to reflect. I saw a post online I disagreed with. Already in a mood  and without much forethought, I posted my opinion, only to be met with an onslaught of criticism. Now I feel I can take criticism, but what I don’t react well to is being patronised. And that’s how I felt reading the responses, and as I tried and failed to explain myself, I felt myself become unsure of my own opinion, lost confidence in what I felt. So I deleted the post. I gave up my opinion. This was just a small fight to give up, in the grand scheme of things it’s not something I’m passionate about, but it made me think about myself. 

What other arguments have I given up too quickly? Am I selling myself short? Am I being the best role model that I can be for my daughter? 

And that’s the scariest thought I’ve had had a mum, that I’m not doing my utmost best for her at every turn, that I’m not putting her first and that I’m letting her down.

So from now on I resolve to be better, to be stronger, because I want both of us to feel the way I did yesterday, everyday. 

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One thought on “International Women’s Day

  1. For every idiot there is criticising, there’s support praising. Well done for saying something in the first place. You’ll have your opportunity again!

    Like

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